Wait a second, those are just fancy scales!

MMM and I went to a fish fry today.  Oh Lent, how I love your fried fish.  Although, I do hate the smell sticking to my very being.  Also, the price tag attached is not my fav.

I have so very much to tell you all about, but I am rather reluctant to relate it all via blogger.  Much as I love you, blogger, you are merely not an adequate substitute.

In other news, Awkward!Toby has taken to constantly encouraging me.  Apparently at some point I used the phrase "I suck at life" when having a moderate difficulty.  He has taken it upon himself as a personal charge to point-out whenever I do something well.  This is actually quite sweet, except he says things like "See, this is an excellent example of how you are good at life."  Kind of odd.  Awkward, even...

In exciting news, FavCousin asked me to come see his piano recital on the 27th!  He's sooooooo effing good.  I am waaaaaay excited.  What, do we think, is an appropriate "I am so proud of you/ You are effing amazing and rock my socks/ You're my fav cous who is awesome" gift?  He's a vegan...plays piano...loves France...any genius ideas?  If not, I'm going with a fifth of something nice (he's 19).

Aussie = Best Cousin EVER!!!!1

Eureka!

I vote for someone being my friend in a big city on St. Patty's Day!!!!!!  Or the weekend before!!!!  Or the weekend after!!!!!  Because there would be lots of beer and people to purchase it for us and this:

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's you must go and I must bide.

By the time I got home from choir, I just caught the end of this.  I am glad that they posted it.

Hee.

MMM and I went for free pancakes at IHOP.  She judged me for eating Ice Cream for lunch and pancakes for dinner.  Due to this judging, I order sausage to go with my pancakes.

I hate pig products.

Also, she thinks that my allergic reactions are all mental.  And that I am crazy.  And that I am depressed. . .or have mono.  I  finally confessed that I was carrying Awkward!Toby's child and that John had given me mono and my life is in pieces and I need another reason to be so damned sleepy.

She then proceeded to get distracted by something shiny.

In other news, I need a vacation.  Like, it's clear that I just need to get away from shenanigans and breathe.  I don't know if I need a with people vacation or a not with people vacation, though I am inclined to think the former.

"Because that's just how I roll."

Dear Hugh Jackman,

I love you.

Let me count the ways, as seen in the Academy Awards.

1.  I'm going to do an opening anyway, becuase that's just how I roll.

2.  You sing pretty

3.  You can sweep me off my feet any day and take me on stage without a head's up.

4.  "Seriously, say anything you want.  We're on a 70 second delay, but if you win, we're going to a 20 minute delay."

5.  Oh you are classy, not just crazy hot.

6.  Please wear a tuxedo every day.

7.  You put on your top hat

8.  You said "please" when you asked for your stairs.

9.  I'm putting on my top hat

10.  You're not afraid to share the stage.  Feel free to pick me next time.

11.  Doubt: The Musical.

12.  The musical is back.  Feel free to star in all of them.

13.  You know that action is "the cool stuff"

14.  Oh, that accent.

15.  It's 11pm and I should go to bed, but I just can't stand the thought of missing another appearance of YOU.

16.  Your hair is so bouncy!  And fluffy!  I would watch the Academy Awards any time...so long as you host them.

Love,

~me!

Dear Microsoft Word;

I hate you.

I wanted to include this sentence in my paper: "As alluded to earlier, chat reference is now an available service."

I know, not the best sentence in the history of the world, but I don't care about this class.  How does this lead me to have a problem with you, Microsoft Word?

Let me tell you.

You green-squiggely underlined the word "alluded".  This means that you have found a grammatical error.  As an odebient user, I right clicked to see what your problem was.  Your resolution was for me to change "alluded" to "eluded."  Okay, I'll look it up, but for now I'll change it to make you happy.

Then, I hated you.

After I did what you asked, you green-squiggely underlined "eluded."  What the fuck, Microsoft Word?  What. the. Fuck.

Please get your shit together so that you can actually help me.

Love,

~me

Is it just me, or does the little Oscar guy look like Iron Man?

Guys! I am super excited!

Super. Excited.

Also...I am becoming alarmed by how much I am sleeping. This

week's totals:

Sunday night: 9 hours

Monday night: 8 hours

Tuesday night: 9 hours

Wednesday: 6 hour nap; 12 hours over night

Thursday night: 7 hours

Friday night: 12 hours

Just a year ago I was sleeping an average of 6 hours a night and 

functioning properly.

Ugh.

Someone fix it. I am sleeping so much I am behind on homework. I somehow learned a magical trick where I don't heed my alarm unless it is to go to work. I'm so tricksy.

You guys!

MMM cannot spell Walle.  It is sad.  She tried "wally" and then "wallie".  I shook my head in disdain.

Pomme, where are you?  Let's be friends.

Toi. . .let's be friends who do homework together and then watch West Wing or Doctor Who.

Moi.  When am I coming to visit you?  Cause it feels like never.

I went to the Dragon Room today.  It was Dien's birthday.  Haven't seen him in a loooooooong time.  What a fun friend.  He paid for everybody's everything.  It was super nice of him, though most of us objected as it was *his* birthday.  Small details.

In other news, Saki is my friend.

Dear BBC,

Please stop taunting me with videos on your website that I cannot watch in my area.  It is mean.

I would hate you forever if it weren't for YouTube.

Also, the Eleventh Doctor better be less creepy when he's acting.

In the meantime, I shall savor this.

Regards,

~me

Breathe. . .

I stumbled across this.  It makes me happy.  

I accidentally slept for 6 hours this afternoon.  Whoops.

Is there something wrong with me, do we think?  I seem to be quite sleep deprived as of late.

To draw out the contents of; to drain

Longest day of my life.  No joke.  Being closed on a Monday is bad for my health.  It is painful.  It hurts me.  Stupid All Staff In-Service.

Of course, BestBossEVER! trusts me too much or something, so I got the hard job of digging us out this morning by checking in seriously like...oh my God I don't even want to think about how many things.  Too many things.  I was exhausted by 11 and then I had lunch a little after noon because BestBossEVER! was looking out and got my desk time covered so I could cram food into my mouth.  Then I was all happy and bubbly and bouncy again, though a bit tired.  Then I worked really really hard again in the afternoon and then GRPatronhater was mean to me.  And then I just wanted to curl up into a ball and go to sleep or cry or cry until I fell asleep.  But I was still at work, so none of these were real life options.

BestBossEVER! took a picture of the R2D2 cake and emailed it to FakeMom!  She though it was really cool (she did! for realsies!  It says so on my Facebook wall!  That makes it divine truth).

So 5 rolls around and I stuck around at place of work to do homework (I found 3 articles and wrote 2 pages of a paper...that I will have to rewrite, I am sure).  Why on Earth would I do this?  Well, I had choir 2 minutes away from work at 7:30...so there is no point in driving home to turn around and drive back.

I had these for dinner.  Yumm!

And now I am blogging and am about to hit "Publish Post" close Eleanor and proceed to fall into a dead sleep.

Good night!

::whistles affirmation::

Today we had an All Staff In-service at Rival!Christian College's conference center, which I must admit is nicer...  It was not as bad as I thought it might end-up being.  favoriteKate had to be there too, and I was introducing her to people left and right.  It made me feel good about myself!  I've only worked there a year and a half and I know so many peoples!  Yay!

Teen Librarian's birthday is tomorrow (Tuesday) and BestBossEVER!'s birthday is Wednesday.  In honor of their birthdays and their love of Star Wars, I was made the BEST CAKE EVER!  It is a white cake with buttercream frosting (which is basically butter and powdered sugar with a splash of vanilla extract...aka heaven).

Here it is when it was pieces of cake placed together.  It's a 8 by 13 and a 9 inch round.  I actually baked it yesterday, and shaped it, saran wrapped it and threw it in the fridge.  I am SOOOO glad that I had the foresight to do this, becuase I frosted it today for 5 hours.  No joke.

I started with a crumb coat of frosting, and then got out my Wilton frosting bag, tip #18: The Star.  Here it is a little further along the way.

Isn't it pretty!!!

And they made that...the start of the blues

I am feeling much better today.

I have been entirely unproductive.  All I have done is bake cookies, wash my sheets and blankets and do other laundry, wash the dishes, and scrub the bathroom, and write a 6 page paper.

I have to work tomorrow.  Yippie skippy!

BFF is a very good friend.  And a good listener.  Even when I talk on the phone.  Unlike someone else who can't seem to make out a word that I say EVER.

I have decided that I would like to visit the Galapagos islands some time soon.  While I am still young (ish) and tollerant of the heat.  What am I talking about?  I'm dredful in heat.  But, they make you take all of your meals in the boat, to discourage litter on the isalnds.

Who's in?  They have penguins!  And that Tortoise!  And most times of year you can see dolphins!  Oh! oh!  Please, do let's!

Ha!

You Are 70% British

Congrats, mate. You're are probably British. (If not, definitely Australian. Or Kiwi. Or Canadian.) You enjoy most aspects of mainstream British culture, without being stereotypical about it. You also have a typical British temperament. You wouldn't dream of being impolite.

How British Are You?

Change of scenery

I slept for 16 hours today.  I am miserable lonely and depressed.

AuntieV and BestBossEVER! are a bit distressed by my current state, and it has come to my atention that other co-workers are noticing that something is off-kilter as well.

Ch!pper, the best co-worker who makes fantastic cookies and all sorts of treats and is always very kind and quick on the uptake, noticed.  She offered me a room to stay in at her house with its own bathroom, or $1000 if that would help, or whatever I need, I should just ask.  This was very sweet.  Very sweet.  The problem, dear friends?  Her daughter is getting married in October and so Ch!pper's husband, who wants a divorce, does not want the family to know until after the wedding.

In other news, I get to sing at the opening of the hospital's new Hauenstein Center.

Yay!

Umbrellas are fun when they match your raincoat.

It's been a bit since I've had a post of substance.  Here's an attempt.

Auntie V distressed me greatly at work today.  So I ran and hid on the other floor busying myself.

MissM and I tried to figure out from where I lost so much weight.  The conversation would have been entertaining to an outsider, I think.

MissM: What about you thighs?

Aussie: Maybe, but not 25 pounds.

MissM:  Your boobs...

Aussie: ...haven't gotten any smaller

MissM:  And your tummy is the same size.

Aussie:  All of my clothes still fit.

MissM:  One would think that this would not be the case...

Needless to say, we gave-up.

BestBossEVER! and I leafed through a Star Trek Collectibles book.  I decided that I would like these.

favortirekate was in shelving today.  Apparently the pickings are slim for the sub pool right now.  Which makes me feel bad when I pick-up shifts and stuff. . .but oh well.

Also, I found a springy triffle recipe that I can't wait to make.  I love triffles.

Nothing new to report

I went to lunch with Noa today.  At least, that's what her fake says her name is.

The only bad thing about hanging out with a person that you haven't seen in a while is when they inevitably ask, "So, what's new?"

This can be bad in one of two ways.  My response is either:

* Nothing.  Nothing of consequence has befallen in the past two months since I saw you last.  I am a social reject and failure.  I am squandering my life.  You?

* Nothing, really.  I mean, I did totally freak out and cry myself to sleep last night, but you don't want to hear about that.  Oh!  and this funny thing happened at work the other day, but well...you probably won't get it cause you weren't there and you don't know anyone that I work with...Nothing, really.  You?

Actually, sir, after all these years I just sort of go with it.

Midnight. We are going. Consider yourself warned.

Best. Surprise. Ever.

So here I am at work, working like a good little worker bee and in walks Pomme!

Zawhat!  I was soooooooooooooooooooooo excited!

You guys!  I was just thinking **yesterday** about how I hadn't seen her in months!  Since Christmas!  And how that is silly, because she is so very close by.  And then she APPEARED!

I think I might have squealed.  I am certain that I jumped up and down.  I was jsut so excited!  And kind of floored by her appearance.

And then we had yum-yums here and I had a drinky-drink.

Oh, I'm going to be on a happy friend high for the rest of the night!

Not to get religious, but...

I am a good Catholic.  I go to Church on Sundays, Holy Days of Obligation, and Holy Days of Opportunity.  I tithe time, talent, and treasure.  I teach religious ed to 6th graders.  I live, to the best of my human abilities, the Gospel teachings.  I love others, no matter how cruel they are, nor how bad they smell, nor how little they love me.

It upsets me, then, when people accuse me of being a pompous hypocrite.

I am, first of all, a Christian.  If you do not know enough about the world to know that Catholics are not only Christians, but the original form of the faith from which you have devolved, then you can cease speaking to me about religion now.

It is also enraging when people try to talk to me about my personal sins.

Yes I drink, but so did Jesus and the 12.  Mary commanded Jesus to make more wine, for cry-eye.

Yes, I swear.  There is no validation in that.  I would counter, however, that if I am going to have one sinful vice, I would rather it be swearing than the multitude of things that my accusors do...like condone a war in Iraq, or fuck like bunnies with multiple scuzzy partners from corner bars.

Just saying.

Bench Warrant

From law.com Law Dictionary:

n. a warrant issued by a judge, often to command someone to appear before the judge, with a setting of an amount of bail to be posted. Often a bench warrant is used in lesser matters to encourage the party to appear in court.

 Toi, I have a bench warrant that was delivered to my house for fauxrockbro.

I do not know where fauxrockbro is.  What do I do aside from freak out?

Warriors

$port and I kept fighting at work today.  Like, sibbling hitting eachother with books fighting.  BestBossEVER!, who could hear us from within the confines of his office, just laughed at all the commotion.

Later, I was coming out of the elevator and $port was waiting to go down with some carts, so I kept hitting the button so the elevator wouldn't close or go down.  He had already hit the floor button and was trying to go down.  Eventually, he got sick of me preventing him from going, so he came out to move me away from the button.  In doing so, the elevator closed and went down without him.  Bwahaha!

In other news, due to this article, I will begin carrying Narsil with me for protection from nutters.