Scientifically Proven

I have observed that the majority of students at JesusSchool are quite fit. I have not seen any obese children. This seemed a bit...odd...to me, considering that we in America are allegedly experiencing an obesity epidemic.

From the Journal of International Health Science, you can find the recent study "Are obese becoming idiots?":

"Huizinga et al (15) showed that low numeracy numeracy Mathematical literacy Neurology The ability to understand mathematical concepts, perform calculations and interpret and use statistical information. Cf Acalculia. skills are associated with higher BMI. Low numeracy skills and obesity are both common. Numeracy skills are used in healthy weight management to monitor caloric pertaining to heat or to calories. "

So, using this conclusion (taken from this paper:

(15.) Huizinga MM, Beech BM, Cavanaugh KL, Elasy TA, Rothman RL. Low numeracy skills are associated with higher BMI. Obesity (Silver Spring). 2008;16(8):1966-8.

I come to the conclusion that JesusSchool students are obese because they possess the ability to add and subtract. So, smart kids are not fat. That means that only smart kids go to JesusSchool?

Oh, wait, maybe I should finish reading this research study...

"School performance of overweight children has been found to be inferior to normal weight children; however, the reason(s) for this link between overweight and academic performance remain unclear."

Did they really use the (s) to pluralize that? Seriously? Grammar aside, silly scientists, did you really just say that you have nothing to say? It *could* be that they are fat and stupid, just like all of the mean kids say, but it could also be that they don't care about life in general...school work or weight, or that they are naturally chubby and depressed because they are so consistently teased so they do not want to draw attention to themselves through academic performance. OR there is only correlation, not causation. This is my biggest scientific and statistical pet peeve. Just because two events or reactions are correlated does not mean that one is causing the other, or even that what is causing A is also causing B. Epic Fail, science people. Epic Fail. At least you had a catchy title.