Size Matters

As I am sure you are all aware, I am the bestest clearance rack shopper EVER! I rock the socks off with my awesome skillz.

So, here I am at a random department store, combing through the clearance rack (which was ginormous for it being to close/far from Christmas) in the Juniors’ department. I refuse to shop in the old lady section, even if I do get to wear a smaller size there and everything is work appropriate. I don’t know how frequently you shop clearance, but you certainly cannot trust the size indicated on the hanger and everything is jammed in super tight and not so attractively displayed, so sometimes you must just go by color and pull things out to look at them if they seem even quasi promising.

So I pull out this dress that’s light purple on top and black on the bottom and it looks about my size, so I read the tag: X SMALL. It looks about right, though, so I am confused. I decide to put it in my pile of “to try on in fitting room” and continue browsing along my merry way. Throughout the clearance rack I pull some larges and extra larges, my normal Junior Department size, and proceed to the fitting room. The L’s and XL’s were too big, so I went back for Mediums, which fit fine. That X SMALL dress? Totally fit. Super cute. Bought it.

WTF, Junior Size chart? I have complained vocally before about being at “XL” because I am an average size, but you actually listened to me? I know that I have not changed sizes, so either the measurements have changed, or each brand has its own sizing. I am relatively certain that it is the later, which is just annoying. I would like to once again vocalize that we should have the same sizing scheme as Men’s clothing. Pants should be by waist and inseam. Dresses should reflect your bust and hip measurements. I am okay with S/M/L for tops, but why can’t we have a common size across brands. I am sick of being a Small and NYC and a Medium at Old Navy and having to **remember** that for every store that I ever shop at, even if I just want a plain colored long-sleeve shirt. This is not to mention pants sizing. My father has suggested that some stores are intentionally low to raise sales: if you fit into a "smaller" size, you are likely to return there. Of course, this is just confusing when I am a 6 or 7 in one store and a 13 in another. It's just awkward to keep sizing up and the sales people think you are delusional for wanting a 7 when you have such broad, child-bearing hips.

Size matters. Not for my self esteem, but for my convenience and enjoyment of the shopping experience. Can we at least post the sizing chart like online stores so that I can just figure it out that way?

Get your shit straight, American clothing producers--I am not the insane one.